For Burns Night

A wee burns night poem for politicos:Burns

On Sunday raise a gless tae the Bard

Why no? You huv bin workin’ awfy hard

And as ye git tore in tae yer neeps

Ye’r thinkin’: May- hoo mony sleeps?

And who’s gonnae be on yon TV debates?

A parcel o’ rogues, or some ither ingrates?


It’s plein Labour’s no held in much affection

Leadin’ up tae this general election

Will we see MPs dae inither northern dash

Saltires in haun? – Dinna fash!

Cause patriot Jim’s got the upper haun

Oor health will be paid for by Londaun

Instead of MPs getting’ oan that train

It’ll be nurses comin’ tae ease the pain


And dinna caw the PM a sleekit loon

We’ve extra poo’ers – tis written doon!

Nic says naw

It’s her baw

And onywey the Bill will faw

Fir English votes for English law

It disnae go Farage enuech

‘Whit aboot us? Fars the proof?


Meanwhile the nats, draped in tartan

This weekend will be fartin’

They’ll stuff too much puddin’ in their sonsie faces

An’ forget aboot political graces

Hunners o’ members is awfy weel

Bit they’ll no be able to keep them in heel


It gies ithers gey muckle pain

Tae see the nationalists claim Rab as their ain

The bard a nat? dinna be silly

It’s plein tae see he’s a’body’s Wille

So this weekend dinna go starvie

At least we still have Patrick Harvie…